Last week I posted a vulnerable post on my FB page, part of a 5 day challenge I committed myself to to share about my coaching practice. It felt good to write it out. And a bit scary to hit Publish…
The response I got to this post blew my mind. How my story of financial crisis, mid-life questioning, hitting bottom, and showing my vulnerability, could touch people so, inspire them, and mostly show them that they are not alone…
I had no idea what kind of comments I would receive, and the thanks. I did feel vulnerable sharing it. It showed that I was, yes, human. And that I could pull myself up after going down.
I decided to rewrite and share part of my story with you. To show you, too, that you are not alone in life’s experiences, the aging questions, the career changes, the ups, the downs, and the connection we have with each other.
Even though through my dance, writing, and teaching life, with several other side hustles, I had innovated a popular global dance movement, produced several musical releases and online courses, shown artwork around the country, and run several successful businesses, I know what it’s like to struggle with unfulfilled dreams, lots of questioning about my future self, job and and financial insecurity with a lack of supportive income. In a seemingly successful career, I wondered what will I do as an older woman. Years ago, that struggle consumed my life.
I know what it’s like to wake up and worry about paying off debts, hitting bottom, try to solve the issues that were not in alignment with my desires, and losing self-confidence as a leader and mover. Trying to constantly “fix” things. Damn, such a place of unease and continuing cycles of questioning, aging, money, wondering what is next, and how the hell to get there… you know that feeling?
And to lay down at night thinking about things like how to keep my house, how to pay off my debts, how to live my dreams and continue to live with integrity and creativity, how to stay connected with my tribe, ahhh. So many aspects of what I wanted to do with my life…
It got so bad that I at one point the bank told me to walk away from my house and land, give them the keys, and start over again. No freakin way, I said…I’m a fighter and I believe in myself.
So, I know how painful it can be.
And, I know what it’s like to be on the other side of it. To have satisfaction, to ask for and get guidance and support, and gain clarity toward my continuing dreams…and to have a life where I wake up to another day in paradise, everyday magic, heart and soul happiness and fulfillment, a body that moves and grooves, prosperity on many levels, including monetary and soulfuI ways. Because I am worth it. And that’s what we all are here for.
It takes desire, a deep soulful desire, for change. It takes envisioning what you want the future to look like for yourself, with lots of detailing, which is quite exciting and inspiring. You need to commit to yourself, feel that longing to make a difference. It takes a plan, that you will follow through with. Mostly you have to love yourself. Lots of self-compassion and self-care. And believe. Truly believe in yourself, down to your core. And honor your journey.
I go to bed at night with so much gratitude, now, much more joy in my life, belief in myself and what I have to offer to my clients and students, as well as my friends and family, so much creative beauty, and so much wisdom from my roads traveled.
The best part is that I create my life the way I want it, daily. I am a successful business owner and creative woman, I do the work I love, I play and enjoy this life day by day, and I am able to support and lead so many women in living their dreams too.
Of course I want this kind of life for everyone! That’s why I do the work that I continue to do. It took stepping into my desires, getting help to move forward, and really looking at what I had built, where I was, what I wanted to change, and then of course, making big plans and maps on how to get there. Realizing that now, as I have aged and gathered wisdom, over the years, my deeper truth is that I care so much about helping women change their stories, envision their truths and desire, and give them the tools and magic to step up big and full of creative power and love…because of the rekindling of my own desires and passions. Building up again, changing again, into my dream life. Yes, it can happen. And often we do need outside help, and that is is ok, yes, to be vulnerable, to ask for it. We don’t always have to remain quiet or try to be Wonderwomen.
Because I know how painful it can be when you have that feeling of being stuck forever, that overwhelm and not knowing what steps to take to carry on with your passion, especially as we get older…with aging, perhaps a midlife crisis, a financial setback. Desiring something new, to make more money, to start your own business, reawakening the body, searching on spiritual quests. This is so much of living a good life. And continuing to expand into an even bigger and better life.
I have dedicated myself to helping women get clarity and satisfaction, and envision how to fulfill their desires, in body, mind, and spirit. Whether that be creating the business of their dreams, stepping back into their bodies and falling back in love with themselves and their lives, and living their creative and passionate desires… that is such a beautiful way to step up bigger, continue living, and feel so freakin great… don’t you agree? Ultimately, we do want to feel great in our skin, our heart, our soul.
Life is too short to spend it living with mediocrity and dissatisfaction, fear and unfulfillment, always wondering “what if”.
Now is the time to ask, “what else is possible?” And to remember you are not alone. Because you are so freakin’ worth it.
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